Even More Extra Dumbasses!

According to campaign materials from Florida State House District 73 candidate Melissa Howard, she proudly holds a degree from Miami University. Melissa even posed for photos with her degree in marketing. The only problem is that Miami University doesn’t offer a degree in marketing. Eventually, Melissa admitted that the diploma was fake and she didn’t really earn a degree from the university and apologized to her supporters. However, Melissa said it wasn’t her intent to deceive or mislead anyone and vowed to stay in the race. That vow also turned out to be fake because, following the predicted uproar, Melissa has ended her campaign.


South Carolina teachers Brittney Whetzel and Akina Andrews were arrested in April after allegedly throwing a spring break party for students that included beer, wine and tequila. While that alone could end their teaching careers, Brittney has apparently guaranteed herself unemployment as she allegedly had sex with two of the students at the party. That little secret might not have gotten out had Brittney not sent a group text to some of her fellow teachers to brag about it, saying she “couldn’t control” herself. It’s also been learned that before the party Brittney searched online to find out, “Can teachers get in trouble for sleeping with former students?”


An unnamed man, who appeared to be drunk, kicked in the door of Conese Halliburton’s Nashville home last month. Once inside, the man began repeatedly screaming “This is my motherf—ing house,” before using a racial slur on the way out. Surveillance footage from a neighbor’s home shows the man was staying at an AirBnB one house down. While he hasn’t been identified, Nashville police confirmed that he’s a New York Police Department officer.


You may recall the story of former New Jersey school superintendant Thomas W. Tramaglini, who was caught after repeatedly defecating on the football field of a local high school. The so called “Pooperintendent of Schools,” lost his job and was punished. That so-called punishment involves receiving more than $100,000 from his district until he resigns next month.


The Daily Mail claims an elderly Schofield, Wisconsin woman recently crashed her car into an eye care center named 20/20 Vision. Authorities say the woman placed her foot on the gas instead of the brake. One onlooker joked; “I guess she didn’t have 20/20 vision!” No one was injured.


The Union newspaper claims the Nevada County, California Sheriff’s Office recently received several 9-1-1 calls from a man who kept screaming “Whaddup?” The man would laugh before hanging up. He finally stopped calling after he realized he misdialed.